garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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