I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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