id be glad to
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
