I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
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