okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Randomize
