don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize