im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
