SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
