You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
