We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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