Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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