Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
