dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
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