Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
