What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
