Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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