Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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