That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
