I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
why do cheetos always look like penises
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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