New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
