i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Randomize
