Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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