how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
