y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
