I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
