I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize