You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
