I think scott just propositioned me for sex
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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