Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
