we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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