I never want to see another naked old woman again.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
