even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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