The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
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