I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
