It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
