I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
