Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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