you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
