everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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