im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
