I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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