is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
