That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
