I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Four minutes until I can fart!
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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