I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
