Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
