She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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