I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
