you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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