dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
