Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
